


Sex & Surgery

by bobbiejelly



Series: Guess Who's Crushing on Addison Montgomery? [2]
Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: F/F, Guess Who's Crushing on Addison Montgomery?, MerAdd, Sex, Surgery, and, meddison
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-11-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 09:47:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24847783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bobbiejelly/pseuds/bobbiejelly
Summary: Meredith Grey is staring at Addison Montgomery again.
Relationships: Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery
Series: Guess Who's Crushing on Addison Montgomery? [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1797412
Comments: 24
Kudos: 41





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ThatWinchesterGirl67](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatWinchesterGirl67/gifts), [Bluefall](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluefall/gifts).
  * Inspired by [I Tried To Hate You (But Somewhere Along The Line I Fell In Love)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24797041) by [ThatWinchesterGirl67](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatWinchesterGirl67/pseuds/ThatWinchesterGirl67). 
  * Inspired by [Sex and Caring in Seattle](https://archiveofourown.org/works/157220) by [Bluefall](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluefall/pseuds/Bluefall). 
  * Inspired by [The Lesbian Lovers](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/636973) by Arizonaslesbianism. 



_Author's Note:_

Sex & Surgery

A comment fic by bobbiejelly

Someday I might publish this but it first appears as a response to ThatWinchesterGirl67 on "I Tried To Hate You (But Somewhere Along The Line I Fell In Love).

_bobbiejelly_

* * *

**Sex and Surgery**

* * *

Meredith Grey is staring at Addison Montgomery again.

This time Meredith is up in the gallery and Addison is operating and she figures it’s safe because if anyone asks why she’s staring she can always say she just wants to learn Addison’s surgical technique.

Which she does. But not as much as Meredith wants to watch Addison’s long fingers manipulate tiny objects in a way that Meredith just KNOWS they could drive her to the brink of insanity if she were to-

Meredith tries really hard not to confuse sex and surgery.

But it’s really difficult when Addison is operating and Meredith is staring at Addison’s delicate hands and concentrated face and all the things on earth that make her just, so, ADDISON.

In a choice between Sex and Surgery, Meredith has once said to Cristina that she would always choose surgery over sex. Now Meredith is not really sure anymore.

But Meredith doesn’t care about all of that right now. What does it matter anyway, when watching Addison perform surgery is about as close to sex as it gets?

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***** **END OF CHAPTER 1**

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_Author's Note:_

This was the turning point in the conversation with ThatWinchesterGirl67 where I decided to start a whole series about Mer's Addie-Shaped-Panic.

Thanks for all the encouragement on Ao3 and Tumblr!!!

Additionally, if you're reading this and wondering when the hell I might update "Bubble" much less any of my other works... Probably soon? LOL! Help me out with encouraging comments pls.

Take care, and yeah, the title and some of the parts about 'confusion,' are sort of inspired by "Sex & Caring in Seattle," by Bluefall. Seriously, who isn't inspired by that epic WIP!?

Have a great day!

_bobbiejelly_


	2. Sex & Surgery 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first time Meredith Grey gets caught staring at Addison Montgomery...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is inspired by ThatWinchesterGirl67 's comment on the one-shot :)

* * *

** Sex & Surgery 2 **

* * *

The first time Meredith Grey gets _caught_ staring at Addison Montgomery...

It's in the gallery, and at least (for Meredith's own sanity's sake), it’s only Cristina. 

And, to be fair, she’s only there to watch her separate two fetal heartbeats.

Meredith’s own heart is pounding out of your chest because she’s watching her hands like she does as if it were some sort of elaborate foreplay, and she can’t help but feel self-conscious as Cristina adds her endless commentary about Addison’s suture technique.

“You know, I always thought Burke was the best, but the way she handles her tiny sutures, it’s possible Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd rivals him, and she’s not even a cardio specialist!” Cristina exclaims as she leans over to point that out for her best friend. 

“Mer?” Cristina nudges Meredith as she stares, entranced again, her lips gently parted and her expression of utter awe unwavering.

“Huh?” Meredith shifts until she’s facing Cristina again. “She has really good techniques, doesn’t she?!” Cristina continues, and Meredith goes as red as an apple, and bites her lip in response.

“It’s okay, I like to watch too. I won’t tell McDreamy or judge you,” says Cristina with a shrug, turning back to the operating room below them.

“Yeah...” Meredith says with a contented sigh. “She’s amazing...”

Cristina goes on to ramble about obscure heart conditions in infants while Meredith fidgets nervously, hoping that her co-twister-sister can’t tell she’s been mentally cataloging Addison’s exquisiteness all afternoon.

“You know, I have no idea how Derek left someone like that, I mean like, no offense Mer, but just look how she’s commanding that O.R! Hmm, maybe he was really into how bossy she always is...? Or he wasn’t?” Cristina hypothesizes aloud.

If they weren’t so close, and if Cristina wasn’t Cristina, and if she didn’t fully get it Meredith would have felt insulted by all of that, but to be honest she’s not even surprised.

“I know...” Meredith says in a breathy tone.

“Maybe that was Mark’s thing? You think Sloan was McSteamy in it for dominant redheads?” Cristina teases.

“Mm, I wouldn’t even blame him...” Meredith says lustfully before she can contain herself, revealing her deepest fantasies implicitly.

Suddenly, Meredith’s eyes snap open, her hands start shaking, and she’s realized she’s said that lay part aloud and admitted to her best friend she wants her female boss to take charge of her in the bedroom. 

Her spine is as stiff as a rod until she relaxes when she realizes with a chuckle that Cristina hadn’t even heard her through her own analysis of Addison’s closing technique compared to their textbook.

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***** **END OF CHAPTER 2**

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###  [bobbiejelly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bobbiejelly/pseuds/bobbiejelly)


	3. Sex & Surgery 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next time that Meredith Grey gets caught staring at Addison Montgomery from the gallery, she's not so lucky.
> 
> This time she's gotten caught by none other than Satan, herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Lydialyn, who wrote an awesome prompt that I just couldn't let go :).

* * *

**Sex & Surgery 3**

* * *

The next time that Meredith Grey gets caught staring at Addison Montgomery from the gallery, she's not so lucky.

_This time she's gotten caught by none other than Satan, herself._

"Dr. Grey, what are you doing here!?" Addison exclaims at the intern, who shrinks in awe of her boss (and also her crush)'s presence and attention.

"S-sorry, Dr. Montgomery-" Meredith begins, wringing her hands together worriedly.

Meredith freaks out a bit, wondering how much Addison may or may not have noticed her lurking and inappropriate staring and damn near stalking she'd been involved in during the past few weeks.

"It's been a month, and every time I schedule a procedure, I see you up in the gallery. It's like, you won't leave me alone. First of all, you steal my husband. Second of all, you get hit on by his best friend. And third of all, you sit there staring at me every time as if you just _know_ I'm off of my game and you just can't wait to tell Bailey or Richard what a poor teacher I am. I can't get a break here, Grey, I just need a moment without you!" Addison begins.

Meredith's mouth drops open in shock when she realizes her presence _has_ been noticed. The entire time in fact. And that Addison has attributed almost an entirely opposite reason to the truth as to why she's been so preoccupied with the red-headed Attending's O.R recently.

"Addison…" Meredith tries to cut in, but she's cut off sharply again by Dr. Montgomery.

"Dr. Grey, if I would even be addressing you as such when you insist on calling me by my first name. I've worked long and hard at this, I've trained and studied for years, I've become a resilient teacher, and I take on the tough cases. I'm tired, exhausted, in fact, and why can't we go back to when you stayed on 'three,' and I went back to 'two,' and when I just needed a moment away from you because every time I see you it makes my blood boil, and Goddamnit, Grey, I am hardly keeping it together here!?" Addison insists, as she gesticulates accordingly.

"Dr. Montgomery-…" Meredith shrinks again, hands now fiddling with nothing in particular to contain her nervous energy. "I am- I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to upset you, I didn't want to make you feel uneasy, if you don't want me to watch you anymore I won't, I just…" Meredith can't find the words so she just rambles on nonsensically in her head again.

"Say it, Grey. I'm a failure, I'm pathetic, and I'm standing here yelling at an intern because of my own marital explosions and insecurities. Gosh, I'll never get it together, now will I?" Addison sighs, hanging her head in accompaniment.

"No, no, you're not, you're not all that bad Addison, really," Meredith pushes through Addison's eyebrow-raise at being called only her first name again. "You see, you've had so many successful surgeries in the past month. You've beaten records, you've shown more to me friends. I mean, Cristina Yang's been even in here skipping off of Burke's service when you have a really unique cardio case. I- I'll go if you want me to go Dr. Montgomery… But I'm here because I want to watch you work your… Magic? Magic! Yes, that's it. Your- You're like magic in there…" Meredith says awkwardly and shyly, and then she bites her lip because she can't bear to look up to meet Addison's eyes again.

"Oh," says Addison, finally looking for Meredith's expression. "I didn't know, I'm sorry for yelling. I'm not even that pissed at you, I'm mad at Mark, I'm mad at Alex, I'm mad at Derek… God knows, I'm just angry and you happened to be in my way. It won't happen again," Addison offers.

"It's okay, Addison. I mean, I was sorta stalking you…" Meredith says barely above a whisper this time.

"RIght…" Addison squints to try to understand the blonde this time.

"Umm…" Meredith doesn't want to continue, and begins blushing furiously again.

"Wait, what's up?" Addison asks, suddenly concerned, but more so deeply confused at the surgeon's reaction to her.

"No, ah, never mind. It's inappropriate, it's too embarrassing. I'll ah, catch you later…" Meredith tries to brush past Addison to exit the room as soon as possible.

"Wait-" Addison catches Meredith by the arm, standing in front of her softly again, and then releasing her hand so that Meredith isn't restrained anymore. "You don't have to talk to me, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to…" Addison begins, suddenly needing to make Meredith feel comfortable. "But why… Why were you stalking me?" Addison inquires, still completely oblivious.

Meredith as to resist the impulse to scream something back like ' _I JUST REALLY WANT TO SEE YOU WORK THOSE HANDS WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL GET OVER IT.'_ and squirming under Addison's piercing gaze the same way that Addison had just been under hers.

"Look, I just… I just want to watch you, that's all," says Meredith. "I mean, it's my job, right? I'm a student, and you're an Attending, and we're both physicians, and you have interesting patients, and I should want to watch and so I do, and I notice things, and I notice you… So I watch you a lot. So I watch you until my vision gets fuzzy. SO A LOT OT THINGS!?" Meredith starts flailing her hands around vividly to accentuate that she has _honestly no good idea or reason she's been staring at Addison Montgomery for the past actually six to eight weeks continuously._

"So, you're interested in maternal medicine, then, I gather…?" Addison keeps trying to be somewhat comforting at this point.

"I guess…" Meredith mumbles, not wanting to scream aloud ' _oh, but honey, I'm much more interested in YOU….'_

"Why do I sense that you're lying again?" Addison asks her, and Meredith's blue eyes cloud over again.

"Umm, sorry, I guess I was…" Meredith answers noncommittally. "I guess I was just… interested…" she concludes finally.

"In my work?" Addison tries again.

"Mostly…" Meredith squeaks out, then takes a big gulp of air, and then folds her hands over and over again.

"What else could you possibly be interested in?" Addison sighs, wanting to figure it all out once and for all at this point.

"Your ah, your fingers…" Meredith finally barely says under her breath for Addison, now.

"My _fingers_!?" Says Addison. "What kind of answer even is that?' She summarizes.

"Your fingers look, just, they're like you but a piece of you. Like, majestic, and stylish. Strong, complete, but effortless, and graceful like I'll never be, and they look so damn warm, and not too hot, and just nice to the touch. Soothing almost. Like, a patient would be really lucky to have you reassure them y'know?" Meredith tries to explain herself, hoping that Addison will finally get off of her back once she does.

"You just think I have nice fingers?" Addison asks her.

"Yes," Meredith offers.

"Oh," Addison responds to her.

"So I'm ah, I'm just gonna go now, if that's okay," Meredith tries to sidestep the redhead.

This time, Addison doesn't follow her, and allows her to pass by for the door.

Meredith can't help herself though, she turns around before leaving, and leans against the door, and says in as a confident voice as she can muster "I bet your hands are gonna make someone really satisfied someday, and I still can't figure out why McDreamy and/or McSteamy gave up on those perfect hands for anyone else, especially me, in the end," she offers. And then, Meredith allows the door to slide closed just as Addison's eyebrows shoot up to the ceiling, and her jaw drops practically to the floor.

Addison considers her ex-husband's ex-mistress' bold admission, and suddenly her 'perfect' hands aren't so steady anymore. This time, it's her turn to be nervous. It's her turn to feel butterflies. It's her turn to turn around and call out to Dr. Grey to see if she'll come back to keep watching her again.

It's not only for her ego, or her competition, or much less, her sanity.

It's for the pureness of Meredith's expression of her attraction to her, the symbolic person of her past hatred now aching for her making Addison ache for her back all inside.

"Wait, Meredith," Addison calls out hopefully, her 'attending physician's voice,' long gone, and her 'tender, silken, gracious,' voice emerging from the confines of her deeper being.

"Addison," Meredith opens the door again, revealing that she'd not walked past the entryway to the door after all.

"You have nice fingers also," Addison begins, walking a few strides to press her palm up against the intern's.

The feeling of their hands together like this ignites a strange sort of feeling in both of them.

The longing, the regret. The old, the new. The past, but also the hope for a future that's less of an uphill battle than before.

"I want to watch you, next time, if I may," Addison husks lowly, for Meredith to hear her subtext.

"Yes…" Meredith sees the flickers of desire forming in Addison's deep green eyes, which she's long since figured out are matched in her own.

"Will it be confusing, Dr. Grey, to be thinking about both sex & surgery at the same time?" Addison finally asks the blunt question aloud that's been thrumming in the air for eternity now.

"Hardly more now that I know that the feeling is mutual, Dr. Montgomery," Meredith practically growls for the first time.

"Would you like to know just what these hands can do, Dr. Grey?" Addison runs her hands with featherlike touches down Meredith's shoulders to illustrate this.

"Please," Meredith purrs under the attention and shivers at Addison's incredible skill at seducing her.

It's all of her fantasies forming right before her very eyes.

_(As Addison nods in confirmation that these thoughts hadn't been all that one-sided after all)._

"Alright then, let the lesson begin".

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***** **END OF CHAPTER 3**

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Thanks for all of the Twitter and comment encouragement folks! There are some new updates from other authors today, hope that everyone who wants to will check them out and support them as you have me. Cheers :)

###  [bobbiejelly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bobbiejelly/pseuds/bobbiejelly)


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